Take Yourself on a Date
Have you ever taken yourself on a date? Why not today?
Taking yourself on a date can be simply waiting for the snow globe to calm. As you sit, notice your body and relax into your broader awareness.
My Mom was really good at this. After a hard day, Mom would say ‘I think I need a mental health day.’ She’d then find a way to pamper herself, celebrate life, and relax into being on her own.
I’ve found the phrase “taking oneself on a date” to be helpful in reminding me to acknowledge my need to be with myself in an intentional way.
If this sounds too “romantic” or strange. Just think of this suggestion as the need to spend some quality me-time. Take some time to get calm and centered with your innermost self. As we calm the fear, flight, and freeze lizard brain, we begin to coax our calmer, wiser, inner truth into being.
Our wisdom animal inside needs to feel it’s safe to come out. Like the feeling of a lover who knows it’s OK to be naked and share a secret. Our soothsayer is often locked away or on sabbatical, waiting out the storm of anxiety to reside. We all know that it can be a scary world out there.
You Already Know Enough
Do we really need any more information to make a decision about what’s most important to us? Talking it out with a friend might help, but it also might just add new opinions to the fight, flight, or freeze concerns as well. We can always dream up more worries, concerns, and challenges too, but these threats live on the outside.
In fact, we know more than enough. When we listen to our wonderful body wisdom, we can hear our sentient selves asking us to claim this very moment.
We may have lots of reasons not to listen, but the whispers from our inner wisdom are there if we create the conditions we require to listen.
When we take time to be with ourselves, even for a few moments, we can feel and appreciate our own truth.
You don’t need any more ideas.
I’m purposely not going to list a bunch of ideas for taking yourself on a date. You know how to take care of yourself if you really want to.
Forest bathing, or taking a walk in nature, is a wonderful way to reconnect to yourself.
Simply imagine you're a person who needs to be cared for. What would you do for someone who needs to be cared for? How might you help them? How might you help them feel safe, and comfortable?
Once we are relaxed, our lizard brain can release its fierce anxious or aggressive stance.
In these moments, we can access our deeper wisdom.
Think of a time when you made a great life-changing decision. Perhaps it was when choosing a life partner, going to a school, reading an excellent book, or having a life-changing experience. What led you to that great decision?
For me, it was doing a lot of yoga. Stretching my body so I could more fully relax. Discovering meditation and practicing more music. These helped me calm the noise. I’m still not flexible in my body, but I can find my wisdom animal and coax her out into the light.
What’s your secret way of taking yourself on a date?